Everyone expects you to be on cloud nine right now don’t they?
You’ve just married the love of your life, your wedding day was perfect and guests are telling you what a wonderful day it was. Yet, you’re suffering with a serious case of post-wedding blues.
Wedding planning has completely consumed you for up to a year or two. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that it’s been all you could think about for the last few months. Making sure your day was perfect became your very existence and now it’s over. Sound about right? You know how I know? Because nearly EVERYONE goes through it! And nearly everyone feels ashamed of it.
Post-Wedding Blues are NORMAL
When nearly all newlyweds suffer with post-wedding blues, it shouldn’t be taboo. It might be that only one of you is suffering and statistics show that it’s quite often the woman as she was a lot more hands-on with wedding planning. So talk to your husband. Explain that you’re elated to have committed your life to one another, but having been so focussed and busy for several months, you now feel a little lost and empty.
Process your thoughts
Take yourself off somewhere with no distractions and understand exactly why you’re feeling the way that you do. Then, rationalise it and make a plan. Are you lost because you have so much spare time right now? Did the day not quite go as planned (it’s very normal to have the post-wedding blues even if it did) or are you just simply sad because you’ll never get to do it again? Counteract your sadness with reason and a way to ‘solve’ it. If you’re struggling with all your newly-found free time, take on a project or a new hobby. If it’s because you’ll never have another wedding day, think about why you got married in the first place and plan some special time with your new husband/wife.
Post-Wedding Blues are Temporary
Some will only have that low feeling the day after the wedding, for others, it might last a few months. But, knowing that it won’t last forever and actively helping yourself to feel more positive will definitely shorten the suffering. For me, it only lasted about 2 weeks. It was a very low couple of weeks and I felt very alone. I thought by telling anyone how I felt made me seem in some way ungrateful for the wedding and more importantly; the new, married life that I had just begun. Realising that others felt the same way and actively seeking to combat it definitely sped up my recovery.
Keep up the health regimes
If you were healthy-eating and exercising pre-wedding in order to look your best in your dress/suit, keep it up! Grabbing comfort foods and spending every night watching tv will only make you feel more miserable. A lot of sugary foods may taste great at the time, but will only cause your mood to crash and you’ll feel worse later on. Similarly, if you see those pre-wedding pounds sneaking back on, you will only feel worse for it.
Find a new focus
Look for a new a job, makeover a room in the house, or take on a hobby. If you’re busy and enjoying what you’re doing, those post-wedding blues will give up trying to bring you down. Keeping your mind busy with your new project or simply reading a good book during down-time should soon see them off for good. Having something else to look forward to, such as a holiday will also help to keep your spirits high.
Ask for photos
Until the professional photos come back, browsing through guests’ amateur shots are sure to make you smile. It’s interesting seeing the day from someone else’s perspective. Creating a photo book of all these photos will keep you busy whilst you eagerly wait to hear from your photographer.
Meet with your bridesmaids/groomsmen
Talk about the wedding in its’ every detail. It’s unlikely that you all stuck together all day, so you will all have your own memories and funny stories to tell. Hearing people talk fondly about your day and thinking back to all those favourite moments will give you the boost that you need.
Get a new look
Don’t be afraid to speak up
Post-wedding blues are normal. Don’t feel the need to hide your feelings. Talk to close friends or family about how you’re feeling and be kind to yourself. If a little extra me-time, or even a day or 2 away is what’s needed then do it. Before you know it, you’ll have your first wedding anniversary to plan!
All advice and opinions are my own. I am not qualified to offer medical advice. If you’re concerned that you may be suffering from more than just post-wedding blues, or feel that you may need some professional support in recovering, then please speak to your doctor.
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