You may think you’re being quite traditional with how you plan your wedding but unless the bride was kidnapped for the groom by his groomsmen, you’re pretty much just making it up as you go along!
Yes you read the right, up until the 18th century the groom and his friends would literally kidnap his chosen bride and fight off her family in order to call her his wife. The best kidnapper won the role of best man.
My fiance was very sweet on our wedding morning, he sent me a little gift box to open with a letter full of reasons why he chose to marry me (awww) with some perfume to wear. There was also a six pence with a note to pop it in my shoe. I had mentioned to him previously that this was the end of the rhyme something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, then completely forgot about it. Apparently the 6 pence is supposed to bring the bride wealth, both financial and happiness. I don’t think I ever broke it to my husband that with the huge rush of the wedding morning, that penny never did make it into my shoe! I hope I’ve not doomed myself to a life of misery and poverty!
Spontaneous Wedding Day Demons
And then there is the whole veil over your face to stop evil spirits getting in! I took a huge risk on my special day and wore my veil, wait for it; behind my head!! The very real risk of my fringe or make up moving out of place seemed far more terrifying and likely on my wedding day then a spontaneous attack on my face by evil spirits!
There are traditions that most follow without even realising it’s a tradition, or that it has a meaning. I had a wedding cake, why? Because I like cake and imagine that most of my guests would too. I later read that a wedding cake (although looked nothing like our wedding cakes of today) was originally shared as it was good luck to share something sweet with your partner on your special day.
We exchanged rings, we wear them on the ring fingers of our left hand. We never stopped to question why or understand the symbolism behind it (it’s actually the only finger with a vein that connects straight to the heart) It’s just something else that on the to do list when planning a wedding and my sparkly platinum band does look lovely cosied up next to my diamond engagement ring.
So has a traditional wedding just become a tick in a box to please mum and dad or a photo album shared on Facebook? Has it lost it’s meaning and does this make a wedding of today less special?
Why do we want to get married? Have you ever really asked yourself why? Is it just the next step in your relationship? What society expects of you?
Do we NEED a wedding?
I thought about this for a long time when planning my wedding. Did I need a piece of paper to say I can now call myself Mrs.? Yes, the day appealed to me massively, I wanted to be a princess and I wanted all of my family to be there with me to eat nice food, laugh and dance the night away in my name, but deep down I knew why I was getting married.
I could look at my fiance and wholeheartedly commit myself to him for the rest of my life and I wanted the world to see how happy he made me. It gave me a feeling of ‘making it’ knowing I could settle down with this man, have a family with him and we would never need anything or anyone else to complete us.
So to hell with tradition; when it comes to evil demons and spontaneous kidnappings, but like millions before you and millions ahead of you, if you chose to marry your partner because you can be completely yourself around them, let them see the deepest darkest side of you and they still make you feel like the only person in the world, that’s what matters. Make that the tradition to have at your wedding. A love so strong you don’t think it’s ever been experienced before.
So if you choose not to wear your something blue but you stand in front of someone that you would give your last breath to, then you’ve got it right.
That said; if your dad offers to pay for your big day, you should absolutely gratefully accept. There are some traditions you just don’t want to mess with!
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